We’ve all been there — standing at a crossroads, feeling pressure to respond, act, or decide right now. But sometimes, the best thing you can do for yourself is pause.
When your emotions are running high, your nervous system goes into survival mode. You might feel like you’re being logical, but your brain is actually prioritizing safety over clarity. That’s not your fault — it’s biology. The good news? You can learn to recognize the signs and give yourself the space you need to return to a calm, grounded place.
Here are five clear signs you’re not in the right emotional headspace to make a rational decision:
1. 🧠 Your Thoughts Are Racing or Rigid
If you feel stuck in all-or-nothing thinking or find yourself replaying the same thought loop, take it as a cue to slow down. The truth is rarely black or white, and you deserve the time to explore the gray.
Grounding question: “Am I open to other perspectives right now?”
2. 💥 Your Body Is Sounding the Alarm
Tense jaw. Shaky hands. Knotted stomach. When your body feels like it’s under attack, your brain isn’t wired for long-term planning. It’s focused on survival.
Grounding question: “Is my body calm, or is it telling me I’m in fight-or-flight?”
3. 🗣️ You Feel Urgency to React
— Not Reflect
That urgent need to reply to a text, make a decision, or fix something right now? That’s often emotional urgency, not real-life urgency. Your nervous system is asking for relief, not resolution.
Grounding question: “Am I responding, or just reacting?”
4. 😶 Emotions Are Leading the Way — Without a Map
Feelings like fear, shame, anger, or heartbreak are completely valid. But when they drive your decisions without a pause for reflection, they can lead you somewhere you don’t want to go.
Grounding question: “Have I processed how I feel, or am I trying to act my way out of discomfort?”
5. ⏳ It Feels Like Now or Never
Big life decisions rarely have to be made immediately. When something feels urgent and desperate, take a moment to breathe. Urgency often masks emotional overwhelm.
Grounding question: “Is this a real deadline, or is it coming from panic?”
🌙 My Favorite Self-Check:
The “Sleep Test”
Ask yourself: “Would I still feel good about this choice after a full night’s rest?” If not, it’s okay — and wise — to wait.
The truth is, you deserve to feel safe and calm when making decisions that matter.
Pausing isn’t weakness. It’s wisdom. It’s a practice of self-trust.
So if you’re not sure, don’t rush it. Give yourself permission to wait until the storm settles.
You’re not behind. You’re being intentional.
With care,
Samantha
🧠 Therapist | 💚 Advocate | 🌿 Human